Sunday, May 28, 2006

Car crash

I have been writing that I am exhausted for months now. This move is really draining. Hubby has been burning his candle in a double boiler though. Yesterday morning (Thursday), it all caught up with us. We had practically just left the house to run some errands before the movers arrived to load up and we were grabbing a drive through breakfast. A large Diet Coke spilled over onto hubby as he drove and we both dove for it. I have always preached:
1. Let the drink spill
2. Hit the deer (I grew up in Texas and many people have been killed trying to avoid deer that have suddenly run into the road)

But, he was exhausted and judgment was not what it should have been…

I couldn’t get the words “Just drive” out of my mouth before we were on a one lane road to disaster-ville. I looked up to see us clearly headed off the road and toward a telephone pole. I screamed and closed my eyes. Whatever was before me, I didn’t want to see it. Next, the jump of the curb, then through a light pole (literally like right through it) and into the telephone pole. The airbags bags deployed…thank God! I have never experienced airbags before. I am grateful to be alive…and grateful for the airbags that made it possible. I just sat there looking at the now deflated bag praying “Thank you God, Thank you God.” Hubby had jumped out of the car and run around to my side. I was afraid that adrenaline was not allowing him to feel pain since I knew that I was hurting. I found out later that my side had taken most of the impact.

There was a police officer eating his breakfast in the parking lot that we had just left, so help arrived rapidly. I was taken by ambulance to the ER, but only because I have a history of back and neck injuries and was feeling a bit of tightness.

To make a long story short, I am still not feeling good. More bruises are showing up and my back is feeling pretty lousy. I am a bit unsteady, but I think that is just because the rest of my body is in pain..not because I hit my head or anything. Hubby is fine…thank God! We turned the car over to the insurance company so it could be written off as “totaled.” We have moved and are now surrounded by the walls of our new home and boxes containing the contents of our former one. We are very grateful that our injuries did not accurately reflect the severity of the crash. We are trying to spend more quality time together. I am having “day-mares” about the accident as opposed to nightmares. Hopefully, those will subside soon.

Hug those you love and be an organ donor!

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

A couple of more nights...

Just a couple of more nights in this house and it is off to the new place for good. Today is probably the first day I have actually been *excited* by the thought of the impending move. It has always been that this needs to be accomplished or that needs to be done. But, now the time is almost here and regardless of what is or is not completed...we will be sleeping in our bed in our new house on Saturday night. Friday night we will be there, but still crashing on the air bed.

Of course, it is not all a good reality. The fact that I will be away from hubby for 2 months (possibly less) is killing me. We'll know more about how long he will actually be staying here next Friday when he meets with the incoming Senior Pastor. I want to go on vacation. I want to relax in our new house. I want to lie in the hammock and listen to the water falling into our fish pond below...but I want to do it all with him. Not alone.

Whatever is to be will be. Good or bad...it will be what it is supposed to be.

Monday, May 22, 2006

I'm not sure what this is going to be about...

I really have no idea what this post is going to include. I guess I should have just titled it "A Stream of Consciousness." The house is not completely packed, but that is the movers' jobs. The granite will be installed in the new house on Thursday so we are going to drive down Wednesday afternoon. The floors are finished. I still have this thing in my calf that has been there for years, but supposedly doesn't exist. It is really weird. You can feel it. Sometimes it is really hard, sometimes it is the size of my thumb, sometimes it is the size of a pea. But, nonetheless, you can feel it. It hurts. Actually, more like an ache that makes you move. And, there is the bright blue vein that leads right to it. When I first complained about it like 3 years ago, my doc thought it might be a blood clot. I went and had an ultrasound done and that was ruled out. My hubby kept massaging it at my request. It temporarily got better and then returned. By this time, I was seeing a different PCP. She could feel it, actually she said she SEE it. So, she sent me for an MRI. The results came back that there was nothing. It has been a long standing joke that "that thing that doesn't exist hurts again." So, here I am again. It hurts. I see her for a physical on Wednesday, so we'll see what she says then. I mean, how much can you argue when a doppler and an MRI show nothing? Oh well.

Today I was reminded why womanhood is not for sissies. Ugh. Need I say more?

I am really pumped about this article re: pharmacogenetics that the Randomites are reading for discussion. Great idea, Q.

I think that is it. So sad. But, I did change the sheets on our bed to our favorite ones. Love these things. They are either 800 or 1000 TC. I forget, but I love them. Good night's sleep!

Ok...stream ended.

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

Moving - underway

The movers came this morning to pack. In fact, they just left. I cleared some stuff out of the garage so that they wouldn't pack it. Heck, we have more stuff than we need already. We have more stuff than we WANT actually. That is just sinful in my opinion. So many people completely without and we have more than we know what to do with!

Somehow, I wrenched my lower back. This is not anything shocking..it happens frequently. But, nonetheless painful.

The pups have to go to the vet tomorrow for their annual exams and to get their shots updated since they will be boarded in a couple of weeks when I go to the OPM Conference. I am really looking forward to it (the conference, not the vet)! I haven't heard of anyone I know planning to go, but I know that all of the rooms that were blocked off are taken, so I am anxious to meet some people.

I really need to go get something for lunch. The movers packed up the pantry, the spices, the dishes...the kitchen. Everything but 5 bananas, a few bad oranges and a couple of tomatoes that I will give to the neighbor across the street since the knives were packed too.

I think I will go surf around at SDN...

Have a good one.

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Counting the days...

We completed our >1000 mile week (approx) last night. Exhausting. I am really worried about hubby. We drove back Saturday night, he left early for services on Sunday morning, then met with a family about a funeral (I had already returned home from church for a nap), then we got the bulletin done for the funeral so he would not have to worry about it being done correctly without him in the office...then we watched Grey's Anatomy (ahh!) and got to bed about midnight. Monday morning, we were up at 5am and on the road to the new house at 5:30. We had people everywhere...fence guys, plumbers, electrician, flooring...we retreated to the attic (obviously, it is a finished attic) for some rest. I was so exhausted that I slept through them sanding the floors below me! Hubby laughed. He was shocked that I could actually do that. Anyway, he didn't get any sleep. Poor thing. He has been burning the candle at both ends. I have at least been able to sneak a nap here and there. Today, he had to be up to do the funeral and a graveside service....then stay late to teach a class that he rescheduled from last evening. I will go in to have dinner with him later. Hopefully, he will lock his door and grab a nap between the funeral and dinner.

I had planned on driving both ways yesterday, but had a really bad dizzy spell about halfway there when we stopped to pick up breakfast. I felt bad that he had to drive knowing that he has gotten ZERO "good" sleep in the recent past. (That was redundant, eh?) I think it was because I drank some iced tea the evening before and I have had my problems with caffeine. I am obsessed with thinking it is something wrong with my heart, but I am wasting my life obsessing about that. Sometimes I can't tell if these fuzzy aches in my chest and back are actually muscular (the fibromyalgia acting up - which is totally logical with the nuttiness going on) or something I should REALLY be paying attention to. The fibro often has some of the same characteristics as cardiac issues...dizziness, chest pain, nausea, etc... but, I have also learned that my body is so quirky that I can't really follow "normal" protocol.

I hate the fact that my wonderful husband must deal with the crap that I deal with...through me.

This weekend was very difficult for him. Mother's Day was the 1st anniversary of his mom's death. We were moving at that time too. He had to make the decision to remove her from life support...she died shortly thereafter. He had graduated from seminary that same week and closed on the sale of her house the day before (until shortly before her death, she was going to move with us to Texas because living in her home was no longer an option...it had become too dangerous.) It was the house he had grown up in. The only home he had known until we got married. Even a year after we got married, it became his (our) home again when we moved in to take care of her. She had become chronically and later terminally ill. Those were a rough 3 years. We moved last year at this time as well. Now, we are setting down roots...we bought a house out of this area and plan to raise a family there...a small family...but a family.

To those of you who read my blog regularly, please forgive my constant whining. I feel like that is all I do. I am working on getting better. There is so much more in life to be grateful for that to complain about...I need to take advantage of those opportunities more.

Have a fantastic day!

Sunday, May 14, 2006

Shut up screaming muscles

Barely makin' it. Drove back last night. New light fixtures are up (thank you, good electrician)...kitchen floor almost complete (thank you, good floor guy)...all but one bedroom primed or painted (bathrooms don't count). Fence not done...yet (they are beyond ticking me off)...move day is in 2 weeks.

Drive back tomorrow morning at 5:30 or so. Wish us luck.

It will be over soon. I keep telling myself that.

Thursday, May 11, 2006

Driving, driving, and more driving

This move is exhausting. I can't even create a coherent sentence...so bear with me. I drove down on Tuesday- painted, painted, painted and painted some more. Then, I drove back Wednesday night. I think...is today Thursday? Tonight, we meet with the mover, tomorrow morning I have a doctor's appointment and then we get back in the car to head back down. We will stay there until late Saturday night - working and meeting with the floor guy who will start on Monday. Then, drive back...church Sunday here (since, it is more than worship for us..it is hubby's job) then drive back south on Sunday afternoon...stay through Monday and then (thank you , GOD!) we will make the drive for the 6th and final time in less than a week! We will not make the drive again until Friday (at earliest).

Ahh..I am wiped out just having typed that!

When I got to the house on Tuesday, I opened the console in my care only to NOT find my keys to the house. Hubby had stuck them in his pocket and failed to return them to my safe keeping place. As you can imagine, I was none too happy to find this out for the first time while sitting in front of our new house...100 miles south of where the keys lay. We ended up calling the contractor that we have working on the interior and I used his key while I was there.

I don't have any more energy. I am going back to sleep.

Over and out for now.


UPDATE (4 pm):
Have you ever been so tired that you can't sleep? That's where I was earlier. It was awful. Thankfully, I was finally able to get a few winks (then hubby called and woke me up - blah) so I am no longer have that terrible feeling. I have spent the day in bed. Yes, laziness but it has felt sooooo good. I also got a chance to indulge myself in something I really love...thinking about where I want to go..want to be...the road I am on. I am so grateful for the opportunity to go back to school. I often consider the brilliant minds that are without the opportunity that I have today. Those people that, for no other reason than bad luck have no hope for a better tomorrow. As I watch these guys who are building our fence at the new house work in the sun, I realize that while I am envious of the easy-going way they work together and seemingly live their lives, college wasn't even an option for most of them. If more people knew the way the Department of Education loan system works, I believe that more people would go to college and beyond. My point is...there are brilliant minds out there in my yard. Minds that could do much more than build fences if that is what they wanted to do. Please, don't misunderstand me. I don't feel that a person is of any less importance because they are building fences or digging ditches rather than running a company or are a physician. I just have seen too many people look at me as if their life is a waste beseeching me to make mine better than theirs has been. How do you beg back? My belief is that it's not over until it is truly over. Maybe I am a bit idealistic, but it has served me well and I see no reason to essentially die before you do.

How did I get onto that subject? Really, I could go on and on about it. It is something that troubles my heart and my wish is to leave this life with a financial legacy that allows more than merely any children that my husband and I may have to pursue higher education.

Anyway...my heart is really with organ transplantion. I would love to become a transplant surgeon. So, while I was lying in bed wanting to go to sleep this afternoon, I surfed on over to UNOS.ORG . At the bottom of the page, they have a link to a wonderful memorial to organ donors. I encourage you to read the stories. It was very heartwarming as well as heart-wrenching. If you have not already decided to be an organ donor upon your death (or a living donor - if you are willing) and let your wishes be known to your family, I ask that you do that today....tonight...the next opportunity. Please don't wait. There are over 92,000 people waiting. 92,000 people with people that love them, kids that need them, millions of lives that they touch. Don't take your organs with you. Where you are going you won't need them.

Thanks.

Monday, May 08, 2006

I have reached that point were you can longer differentiate between things that must get done and existing. I have spent way too much time on the 'puter today and my calendar is full. I am double booking and I am still out of time. Yes, I know, get off of the damn computer. Whatever. I will. I will. I just don't know where to start. Let's see, the plumber is going to be at the new house on Monday, but from what I understand so is the floor guy. I really need to go down there, but I am about thisclose to going crazy and I'm not sure that a 2 hours drive each way is going to thrill me. Hubby is doing a funeral and a graveside today. I don't know when it will be over. I need discuss our plan of attack with him. The mover needs to come over and I need to schedule a time for them to come pack for us. I don't care where they put things. I just can't do this again.

Whine, whine, whine.

Sorry.

Over and out.

Monday

Ahh...it is past midnight and I will likely sleep until 8am. Not that that is late or anything unusual, but what IS unusual is that I will not rush off to class mid-morning! Yeah! Now, I need ot concentrate on everything MOVING! (I am missing class already.)

I am probably going to go to the new house either tomorrow or Tuesday and stay through Thursday to get some work done. We just got back from there on Saturday evening. This is exhausting. I have so much painting to do (at the very least). We still haven't chosen the colors for the bedrooms nor the office. The trim throughout the house needs to be done and the foyer is lost somewhere in primer land. Anyway, I can't get overwhelmed. Really, I can't.

I got a MySpace profile, but I can't figure it out. It's things like this that make me feel so old. Hubby has a funeral to do tomorrow so he is snoring away.

Well, gave up the idea of dentistry...it's not what I really want...so why?

Sorry y'all, this post is going nowhere fast. Hopefully you will find something else to entertain you for the moment.

Kisses to all and to all a good kiss.

Thursday, May 04, 2006

No class...creepy

I had forgotten how weird it feels to suddenly not have a class to study for. But, now it is upon me once again. It feels uncomfortable - like I am definitely forgetting to do something important but can't figure out what. I have the whole summer to get over the feeling (or get used to it) before I begin with a full load in the in fall.

I will be heading south today to help a friend get things together for her graduation party. I am not looking forward to it as this friend and her husband have annoying the living heck out of my hubby and me lately. Tomorrow, they come to measure for the granite and the guy doing the doorways will return to continue working. Hubby will drive down late after a church function Friday evening and will return with me after the party Saturday afternoon.

Anyway, I have very little to report this morning.

I hope you have a great day!

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

It's Over and I Got.....

an A!!! Woo Hoo! Ok, this may not seem like anything big to all of you SDN brains who consider Western Civ to be a fluff class, but I have never encountered a class more difficult than History. Seriously. Not math, not science, not underwater basket weaving nor any sort of English...History is a killer for me. But, it is over and I got an A. Life is good!

I am thrilled to have gotten that class out of the way...still don't ask me why...it had everything to do with the 4th letter of the alphabet the first time around.

Tonight, I shall re-approach the kitchen. It frightens me and I need to go buy a new fire extinguisher before the event. I am making homemade veggie pizza. Avoid using the stovetop at all costs :) Afterward, I think we are going to work on cleaning out the garage in anticipation of the move. We are so far behind. Still, nothing packed and move day is less than a month away.

Over an out for now my reading people! :)

Hope the day is a fantastic one for you!

Monday, May 01, 2006

Final...done

I took my one and only final today. 21/24. Looks like I got a B+ in the class, but I MAY have enough extra credit and prof respect that I will somehow pull off an A-. Either way, I will take it. I am glad the semester is over and I now must face the reality that I have just completed the last semester in which I will only be taking one class. Dr. Underdog, I hope you enjoyed it! 'Cause it's all over babe! You are being thrown back into the water...sink or swim.

Good luck to all who are taking finals this week and congrats to all of those that are graduating to longer white coats. Hopefully, I will be where you are in a few years!